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	<title>Effective Connecting</title>
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	<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com</link>
	<description>Public Speaking Coach Charlotte NC</description>
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		<title>Are You a Part of the 25%?</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/are-you-a-part-of-the-25/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/are-you-a-part-of-the-25/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 03 Apr 2013 21:20:01 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Spoken]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[effective connecting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[public speaking]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sonja Stetzler]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Speaking Anxiety]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=484</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[You know the feeling – sweaty palms, dry mouth, butterflies in your belly. You are not alone. According to a study published by the Institute for Mental Health in March 2012, about 75% of us suffer from speech anxiety.  Speaking anxiety is defined by a speaker’s level of fear or unease with speaking to a [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-485" title="ID-100102641" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/ID-100102641-300x187.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="187" />You know the feeling – sweaty palms, dry mouth, butterflies in your belly. You are not alone. According to a study published by the Institute for Mental Health in March 2012, about 75% of us suffer from speech anxiety.  Speaking anxiety is defined by a speaker’s level of fear or unease with speaking to a group of people.  Even though speaking anxiety is a common and natural reaction to delivering a presentation, here are 5 ways to reduce this anxiety and enable you to become a more confident speaker:</p>
<p><strong>1. Breathe</strong>. One of the easiest ways to relax is through deep breathing. When confronted with anxiety, most people breathe short, shallow breaths that can heighten anxiety. This short breathing exercise can be done just minutes before you take the stage. Slowly inhale through your nose for a count of 4, hold your breath for a count of 4, and then slowly exhale through your mouth for a count of 4. Repeat the process two or three times. Your pulse should feel slower, you will reduce your tension, and you will feel more relaxed. If you feel faint or light-headed, stop. Avoid hyperventilating.</p>
<p><strong>2. Visualize</strong>. Many professional and amateur athletes engage in visualization to overcome performance anxiety, and it can work for speakers, too. Sit in a quiet place, close your eyes, and imagine your speaking event. Mentally rehearse your presentation from start to finish as a success. In Daniel Goleman’s book, Social Intelligence, he states, “Simulating the act is, in the brain, the same as performing it.”</p>
<p><strong>3. Practice</strong>. Members of the National Speakers Association were surveyed on their top tips for successful speakers. Overwhelmingly, the top tip from the professional speakers was practice! Practice out loud, not just in your head. Rehearse your presentation as if you were delivering to your live audience. The more you practice, the more confident you will be in your delivery.</p>
<p><strong>4. Bounce on a Stability Ball</strong>. This may be somewhat unconventional, and it may not be logistically possible for every speaking engagement, but research has shown that just 15 minutes of tiny bounces on a stability ball decreases anxiety, increases calmness, and stimulates the speech and language centers of your brain enabling you to be more articulate. Many hotels now have the stability balls in their fitness rooms, so it is possible to use one when travelling to speak. Don’t bounce more than 15 minutes; over bouncing can cause disorganization!</p>
<p><strong>5. Meet Your Audience</strong>. Arrive early to your venue to set up your equipment (if you have to set up), and spend the time before your presentation meeting the individuals in your audience. Meeting with audience members before your presentation enable you to focus on their needs, and when you begin your presentation, you will find that you are speaking to friends instead of strangers.</p>
<p>It may take a few trials to find the anxiety-reducing techniques that work for you, however, reducing your speech anxiety allows you to be more poised and polished when presenting. And you may find yourself in the coveted 25%!</p>
<p>Sign up at for your free e-book &#8216;Does your Network?&#8217; at <a href="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com" target="_blank">www.effectiveconnecting.com</a> and to receive updates and discounts on online programs and courses!</p>
<p>Image courtesy of  luigi diamanti / <a href="http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/" target="_blank">FreeDigitalPhotos.net</a></p>
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		<title>Space Matters</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/space-matters/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/space-matters/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 12 Sep 2012 16:09:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=425</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Have you ever thought of how your use of space contributes or diminishes your influence  with your clients or audience? Proximity is often understated in terms of influence and connection. Research conducted on collaboration at Bell Labs years ago concluded that scientists were more likely to collaborate when their offices were closer together than farther [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Have you ever thought of how your use of space contributes or diminishes your influence  with your clients or audience? Proximity is often understated in terms of influence and connection. Research conducted on collaboration at Bell Labs years ago concluded that scientists were more likely to collaborate when their offices were closer together than farther apart. Informal contact at the water fountain or the employee break room at other organizations have produced similar results, with more  interaction and collaboration occurring on projects when people can &#8220;bump into&#8221; others in informal settings. Is your office environment set up so that you can easily and casually connect with others? And if you are a solopreneur, do you regularly get out of your home office, take a walk in your neighborhood, or become involved in community events  to inspire a new idea or relationship?</p>
<p>The physical boundaries and limitations we place around ourselves impact the quality of the interaction we have with others. As a general principle, removing those barriers brings us and our message closer to our audience and instills a greater impact. Move your desk or your chair when meeting with clients, so that you are not separated with a physical boundary. Move from behind the lecturn to shorten the distance between you and your audience when delivering a presentation. This is where the engagement and the connection happen. By removing those physical barriers you create more interactivity, impact, and influence.</p>
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		<title>Can 5S Methodology Work For My Business?</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/can-5s-methodology-work-for-my-business/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/can-5s-methodology-work-for-my-business/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 27 Aug 2012 15:50:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=408</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Depending upon your industry you may or may not have heard of the 5S methodology. This is a method of bringing organization to a workplace in order to maximize efficiency and increase output while helping to cut waste both of time and materials. First developed in Japan, 5S has come to be tied to “just [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-409" style="margin-left: 6px; margin-right: 6px;" title="5s" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/5s-300x218.png" alt="5s methodology for businesses" width="180" height="131" />Depending upon your industry you may or may not have heard of the 5S methodology. This is a method of bringing organization to a workplace in order to maximize efficiency and increase output while helping to cut waste both of time and materials. First developed in Japan, 5S has come to be tied to “just in time” manufacturing in which parts and goods are produced right as needed rather than dealing with the expense and liability of keeping a stockpile. While 5S methods may have originally been coined for use in manufacturing settings the question still arises as to whether it could work for any number of business models.<span id="more-408"></span></p>
<p><strong>Seiri</strong> – The first S translates as Sorting. Every item in and around the work area is gone over. Anything that is deemed non-essential is removed and stored if needed for later use. In a restaurant this may mean storing dishes or utensils that are never used. In a healthcare setting it may mean removing charts and supplies that are not used. In an office setting it could mean clearing desks of unnecessary manuals, files, and more.</p>
<p><strong>Seiton</strong> – The second S translates as Straightening Out or Stabilizing. Everything has a place and everything in its place is the old saying. Clearly mark areas where necessary supplies are to be placed. An example might include marking the shelves in a supply closet so that those looking for paper, folders, etc will know exactly where to look each and every time they need more. It also helps those who put the supplies away.</p>
<p><strong>Seiso</strong> – The third S translates as Sweeping or Shining. Everything should be kept as clean as possible with an appropriate amount of time spent at the end of day making sure that each item goes back in its correct spot. Are all the files returned to their correct areas? Are unused supplies stored properly?</p>
<p><strong>Seiketsu</strong> – The fourth S stands for Standardizing. When you have employees each performing the same tasks do they all use the same techniques and equipment? Could you take one from their station and have them work at a different station without trouble? This is all part of the standardization process. By standardizing workspaces you can cut down on any issues that might arise if a situation was to arise requiring an employee to work at a station other than their own.</p>
<p><strong>Shitsuke</strong> – The fifth S stands for Sustaining the Practice. Once each of the previous methods has been implemented make sure to keep up the work. Not only should you maintain the positive changes that come about from the previous S’s, but you should continually seek out new areas for improvement as well.</p>
<p>As you can see the 5S methodology is not at all difficult to grasp. Also, in truth it can be applied to most any business model you might consider. It could take a little bit of time to ensure a good fit, but if you sit down and think it out you will begin to see just how much 5S can do to help you improve your business.</p>
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		<title>What are the Differences Between a Business Coach and a Life Coach?</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/what-are-the-differences-between-a-business-coach-and-a-life-coach/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/what-are-the-differences-between-a-business-coach-and-a-life-coach/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 17 Aug 2012 00:58:38 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=403</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you have been in a professional job for any amount of time, then you have certainly heard mention of both business and life coaching. While the context of the mentions may differ, you may still not have a clear definition of the two that would allow you to make an informed decision as to [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-404" style="margin-left: 6px; margin-right: 6px; border: 1px solid black;" title="Life-coach3-featured" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/Life-coach3-featured-300x200.jpg" alt="Difference between Business and Life Coach" width="210" height="140" />If you have been in a professional job for any amount of time, then you have certainly heard mention of both business and life coaching. While the context of the mentions may differ, you may still not have a clear definition of the two that would allow you to make an informed decision as to whether one would suit your needs. So, what are the differences between a business coach and a life coach? You might have a clue simply based on the descriptive names of the two, but let’s clarify them both somewhat.<span id="more-403"></span></p>
<p>A business coach is one who will work with you on your professional performance. She or he will help you to get your business squared away and put that fine edge on your business skills. Choosing to work with a business coach is a decision that can help you be your best both in business and in your life as well. The relationship that you form with a business coach is quite simple in that your first goal is to build a strong foundation from which you will build your successes. One question that you will be asked is what you are looking to achieve in your endeavors – what you expect to accomplish in your business – if it were to be running at peak efficiency. Working with a competent and skilled business coach can help you to hone your focus, better your management skills, and increase your motivation in business.</p>
<p>A life coach, on the other hand, is one who focuses primarily on life skills. She or he will help you to determine your strengths and weaknesses from which a betterment plan can be implemented. Working with a life coach will help you to be the best you can be in life and in the lives of those around you. The foundation you work to achieve with a life coach is one based on the successes in life you most wish to achieve. A life coach will ask you to look deep inside and ask what it is that you really wish to achieve in life. Your focus, the direction you wish to go, your personal management skills, and your motivation will all be examined and addressed. Working with a professional life coach will help you to achieve these things which might not otherwise come so easily.</p>
<p>Now that you know the differences, which do you see a need for in your life? Do you simply need some help getting your personal life in order? Maybe you need assistance getting that fine edge on your business skills that will help you excel. Either way, make sure that you speak to a coach who has the professionalism, skills, and experience to help you address those needs. A great coach like myself will know when we can help and when we might need to refer you to someone better suited to your personal needs. Give me a call today and let’s find out what we can do to get you on the pathway to success that best suits you.</p>
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		<title>Business Leadership 101</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/business-leadership-101/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/business-leadership-101/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 06 Aug 2012 14:08:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=397</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[One of the things that you will discover upon becoming a leader is that you will likely become responsible for other people. This may include both their successes and failures. Keep in mind that when those who are under use succeed we do as well. As such, you want to be able to motivate and [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-398" style="border: 1px solid black; margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 5px;" title="businessleadershipphoto" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/businessleadershipphoto-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="210" height="139" />One of the things that you will discover upon becoming a leader is that you will likely become responsible for other people. This may include both their successes and failures. Keep in mind that when those who are under use succeed we do as well. As such, you want to be able to motivate and inspire others as effectively as possible. There are two main ways that you can accomplish this – by getting to know your subordinates well and by developing a strong understanding of their strengths and their perspectives.<span id="more-397"></span></p>
<p>Getting to know your people well includes both as individuals and as the position holders that they are. If you don’t know those who are working for you how can you know what to expect out of them? Sure, you might have various policies and procedures in place to help set the bar, but those are impersonal at best. You need that level of understanding to know whether or not those policies and procedures are realistic or effective.</p>
<p>As a leader you must be prepared to educate and train your people helping them to develop talents. To do so you must understand their motivations, capabilities, important issues, and aspirations just to name a few areas of importance. Leading people doesn’t mean bossing them around. It does mean that you act as a teacher, helper, demonstrator, developer, and builder. You make sure that people know how to do what is expected, help them to reach their potential, and build relationships based on understanding and respect.</p>
<p>You must be the best leader – and person – possible so that you will be able to help those around you achieve the same. After you get to know your people well, you can then begin working on two very important aspects: perspective and competence. An individual’s perspective is how they evaluate a situation or message given their own personality, experience, wants or needs. Everyone has a unique perspective each of which can be shaped by an almost limitless list of variables. One’s culture, familial norms, beliefs, values, age and more can all play a huge role in how they perceive events  et al that are going on in their professional and personal lives.</p>
<p>Competence quite simply means the individual’s ability to succeed at tasks given them in their current role. When you add an individual’s past experiences, training, education, abilities and other such attributes you will get an idea of their level of competence. Competence should play a huge role in your decision making process. The only way to truly understand one’s competence however is to have a good working relationship with them. You have to know them well. When you don’t know your people you may be prone to making bad judgment calls when deciding where to utilize them.</p>
<p>People tend to work best when they know what they must accomplish, how it is expected to be done and just what they are doing. They need proper leadership. By understanding people you will be better prepared to adapt your personal leadership style to suit their needs and thereby offer the guidance that they need.</p>
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		<title>Leadership Communication</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/leadership-communication/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/leadership-communication/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 31 Jul 2012 13:52:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=393</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Being a leader doesn’t always mean that you have great communication skills. Developing good leadership communication skills is a must in order to be successful in your business efforts. How do you know if you are a good communicator? Most people think that if you are a people person then you automatically know how to [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-394" style="margin-left: 5px; margin-right: 5px;" title="leadership" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/leadership.jpg" alt="" width="193" height="128" />Being a leader doesn’t always mean that you have great communication skills. Developing good leadership communication skills is a must in order to be successful in your business efforts. How do you know if you are a good communicator? Most people think that if you are a people person then you automatically know how to communicate well with others. This isn’t the case especially in today’s business arena where memos, e-mails, text messaging and more are methods used to get messages out quickly to others. These forms of communication leave a lot to be desired especially when passing along important information that your employees need to know.<span id="more-393"></span></p>
<p>Getting back to leadership basics is what it takes to build good communication skills. Everyone is in a hurry, and taking the time to really listen can be an effort for a lot of people. This is true especially for fast paced individuals who may try to second guess you on the job. That doesn’t mean that they are bad employees. On the contrary these are often employees that you want on your team. What is absolutely necessary to get the most from these employees is to be sure that you as a leader communicate well with them.</p>
<p>So, how do you know if you have good communication skills? By answering some basic questions you can determine where you may have weaknesses. First, are you surprised to find that employees don’t understand something that you have said? This may be your first clue that you need to brush up on your skills. Do you think about what points you want to get across and the best method of communicating this prior to doing so? If not you may be one of those people that sends out a memo right when the idea strikes.</p>
<p>Do you just scan your memo and make it brief and to the point? This is another way that miscommunication occurs. You understand what you are saying but do all of those individual you sent the memo to know what it is you are telling them? These are a few of the questions that you should be asking yourself to help you determine if you need to brush up on your leadership communication skills.</p>
<p>Being a leader means that you are responsible for seeing that jobs are completed and employees are following your initiatives. Miscommunication is costly and very time consuming not to mention frustrating.</p>
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		<title>Public Speaking Tips and Hints For All Skill Levels</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/public-speaking-tips/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/public-speaking-tips/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 17 Jul 2012 06:43:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=388</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[How many of you have difficulty when it comes to speaking to a group whether it is large or small? A lot of people have a fear of public speaking for various reasons. By learning some simple techniques you can help to quell some of those fears. It is of the utmost importance for those [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-389" title="lecture" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/public-speaking-300x300.jpg" alt="Public Speaking Tips and Coaching" width="180" height="180" /></p>
<p>How many of you have difficulty when it comes to speaking to a group whether it is large or small? A lot of people have a fear of public speaking for various reasons. By learning some simple techniques you can help to quell some of those fears. It is of the utmost importance for those who teach, give seminars or just have to speak to large groups of people to learn how to control those fears. When you learn how to control your fears you will find it much easier to effectively connect with others.<span id="more-388"></span></p>
<p>The first step you must take when you have an upcoming speaking engagement is to know the material. By knowing the material you will feel more at ease and confident when speaking to others. This doesn’t mean that you can’t have notes but you don’t want to just stand up and read those notes either. Having a good feel for the material that you are presenting will help take some of the edge off.</p>
<p>Set up visual cues for your subject matter when possible. This can be in the way of a power point presentation or story board format. These can help you to stay on track and gives you more to concentrate on than just those folks listening. Practice your presentation and the use of visual cues prior to getting up and speaking. This is especially helpful if you are using equipment you aren’t familiar with. Be careful about over practicing and make it a run-away presentation because you have memorized all the material.</p>
<p>Prior to the speaking event get a feel for the room in which you will be giving your presentation. This will allow you to feel more comfortable. Greet people and talk with a few as they are coming in to listen to the presentation. This will help you to feel as though you are speaking to some people that you know and can help. When looking into the audience if possible you may want to use a few of these folks as focal points to keep you grounded.</p>
<p>Above all before giving your speech follow some relaxation techniques such as taking slow deep breaths while having your body to relax. Be sure that you are well rested and have eaten on the day of the presentation. You don’t want part of your anxiety to be from lack of rest or food.</p>
<p>These are just a few examples of things that you can do to prepare for a public speaking event. There are many ways to help decrease your anxiety level. One such means is having a speaking coach to instruct you on public speaking. The more times that you give a presentation the better you will feel about having to give a speech. Remember a lot of people even after speaking for a great many years have that first few moments of anxiety until they begin to speak.</p>
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		<title>Rejection and How to Overcome It</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/overcome-rejection/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/overcome-rejection/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Jul 2012 16:47:09 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[coping]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[learning]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[paradigm]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[rejection]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=377</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[As human beings we have an inborn need to feel safe, secure and above all else valued by those that are around us. When we experience rejection in any form it sends us into a spiral of fear, doubt and even self loathing that can be dangerous. However, it is possible to deal with rejection [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-378" style="margin-left: 6px; margin-right: 6px;" title="rejection" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/rejection-300x225.jpg" alt="Overcome rejection - Effective Connecting" width="180" height="135" />As human beings we have an inborn need to feel safe, secure and above all else valued by those that are around us. When we experience rejection in any form it sends us into a spiral of fear, doubt and even self loathing that can be dangerous. However, it is possible to deal with rejection and actually learn from it. Is it easy? No. Is it automatic? NO. It is however worth the effort that you put into it, and it will make life easier for you in the long run.<span id="more-377"></span></p>
<p>The first thing that you can do to help learn to deal with rejection is to have a paradigm shift. A paradigm is a set way of thinking. When we see others rejecting our instinct, or our paradigm is to be defensive or beat ourselves up mentally. This does little save weaken the spirit.</p>
<p>What we can do is look at this rejection as a learning experience. Take the words or actions a person says or does and flip it. See the positive, instead of “What did I do wrong,” say “What can I do better next time?” Or even let yourself think something as simple as “Let’s take this idea and rethink it.” With this type of thinking you can begin to figure out your next step instead of wallowing in the past and its perceived failures.</p>
<p>This takes practice and a real effort for most of us, but if we really work at it and decide that this is what we want then we can achieve it. Another step to take is to ask the person giving the rejection why they reacted in such a way to your proposal or project. This gives you a parameter in which to build upon the next time you begin to think a project out. There are individuals of course that will just blow you off, but for the most part a true professional will happily give you feedback in order to make you a better asset to the company.</p>
<p>Our own beliefs and thought processes are what hamper us from being successful. The key is to never stop adapting to situations, never stop learning and never stop trying. Rejection will come, but with some time, patience and practice you can overcome it.</p>
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		<title>Dealing with Difficult Employees</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/dealing-difficult-employees/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/dealing-difficult-employees/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 28 Jun 2012 20:56:06 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[difficult]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[difficult employee]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[employee]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[insubordinate]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NO]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=374</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When NO is not Enough You may find that dealing with difficult employees can be trying at best. It can be a real pain to communicate your points across to such employees. This could be due to their lack of attention or even an inability to understand a topic. Odds are many of you reading [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h2>When NO is not Enough</h2>
<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-375" style="margin-left: 6px; margin-right: 6px;" title="Difficult-Conversations-resized-600" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/07/Difficult-Conversations-resized-600-300x300.png" alt="Difficult Employees - Effective Connecting" width="200" height="200" />You may find that dealing with difficult employees can be trying at best. It can be a real pain to communicate your points across to such employees. This could be due to their lack of attention or even an inability to understand a topic. Odds are many of you reading this have had just such encounters. There are times though when dealing with this sort of employee that you may find that telling them no concerning certain issues is just an answer that they are unwilling or unable to accept. So what do you do when NO is not enough?<span id="more-374"></span></p>
<p>Part of the key to positive communications involves ensuring that your message is clear enough to not be lost in translation. For employees such as those mentioned above, you may have to take extra precautions to avoid such issues. Are you being straightforward when you give your response? Are you coming out with a firm ‘No’ rather than burying it in extraneous verbiage that could water down what you are trying to say? Rather than saying something like “I don’t think that your idea is viable at this time,” try saying something much more direct such as “Your idea is not an option at this time.”</p>
<p>Keep in mind that you do not have to be rude or overly abrupt when saying this, but you should make sure that you properly emphasize your point so that there is no room for negotiation. There will be times when you will have employees ask for time off during very inopportune periods such as during the holiday rush or while the company is in the middle of an important group project. Rather than allowing yourself to seem somewhat undecided on the point, make sure that all your employees understand that time off is nonnegotiable during this period (other than during emergency situations).</p>
<p>This will help strengthen your position when approached by that one employee who simply doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer. You will then be in a much more comfortable place to be able to give a straightforward ‘No’ to this person. Even when you make your position clear, there will be those employees who cannot seem to accept no for an answer. What do you do when dealing with these employees? As a manager it is important for you to accept and own your role in the company. Make sure that you are well within your right to offer a negative answer to that employee.</p>
<p>If they continue to push, then you may have to refer the issue to a higher authority. At worst however it may be necessary to counsel the employee on what insubordinate behaviors can mean. Never fear having to be the boss. You are in charge for a reason and should remember that it is your say that counts at the end of the day. Stand strong and let your employees know that ‘No’ means just that.</p>
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		<title>Handling an Angry Employee</title>
		<link>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/handling-angry-employee/</link>
		<comments>http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/handling-angry-employee/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 18 Jun 2012 21:34:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Sonja Stetzler</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Written]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[angry]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[conflict resolution]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[employee]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/?p=369</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[No matter where you work or what the job is as a supervisor you will at some point have to handle an angry employee. Learning this skill can be difficult and does take some practice. As a matter of nature if someone is angry at us then we have an inherent tendency to become angry [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img class="alignleft  wp-image-370" title="angry-woman-737341" src="http://www.effectiveconnecting.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/angry-woman-737341-300x223.jpg" alt="Angry woman" width="210" height="156" />No matter where you work or what the job is as a supervisor you will at some point have to handle an angry employee. Learning this skill can be difficult and does take some practice. As a matter of nature if someone is angry at us then we have an inherent tendency to become angry with them. When this occurs it is generally a no win situation and nothing gets achieved. Handling an angry employee takes some skill and the right techniques can diffuse the situation.<span id="more-369"></span></p>
<p>Delaying handling the angry employee has a tendency to make the situation worse in the majority of cases. There are exceptions to this such as when both parties are angry and there is no going forward or resolving the issues at hand. When this occurs it is generally better to give each person a little space to rethink their approach on the topic or problem at hand. The ticket here is to not let it sit for so long that instead of rethinking each person continues to build their anger until it becomes irresolvable. Set a specific time that you will meet and work through the issue at hand.</p>
<p>In the majority of the cases when handling angry employees action should be taken at the time that the issues occur. Anger issues tend to be destructive to the company when not dealt with effectively and quickly. Anger can grow and become a much bigger problem when not dealt. By dealing with it quickly as a leader you demonstrate that you are concerned and that you value the employee’s perception of the situation. This is important to growing a great team of employees.</p>
<p>Handling employee anger will also depend on where the interaction occurs. In most cases it is best to deal with the issue in private. There are times when this is impossible and it must be dealt with now rather than later. When this happens remain calm and ask the employee if they would rather deal with this in private.</p>
<p>Handling an angry employee can be difficult but by using positive techniques, dealing with the issues quickly and allowing the employee to verbalize their position can help to diffuse the situation. When different people work together you will invariably have some issues. Learning to work through these is what makes an excellent team because each person brings something unique to the team.</p>
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